4.29.09 or a couple open letters

Soooo I have a post all ready in my mind to go documenting a very interesting 4 days over the weekend, ending yesterday but I need to vent first. Then I will come back and do that post with photos mind you.

Dear Lady Who Cannot Control Her Children,
Do you see the waiting room? Do you see the size of this office? Since you do not this leads to my other question: Do you see a sandbox, monkey bars, or the soundproofing? Obviously not but it sure seems like you do. Nice fantasy world you live in. I'm glad you let your kids run rampant while the third one gets treated. Don't get me wrong, we have kids come in here all the time but THEIR parents are not complete and utter TOOLS with their parenting skills. I'm glad today you gave your daughter a piece of paper and a black marker and let her scribble all over the white couch in the waiting room. Can I tell you how fucking amazing it is that your kids go "I don't wanna wear my shoes" and you say "So take them off." Really lady? In a doctor's office? And I'm glad you let your son play in the closet. I don't even go in that closet if I can help it, that thing is so full of crap it's dangerous for adults. Oh and thank you for taking stuff out of it for your kid to play with. Which he then hit against the door of a treatment room with someone else in it who is NOT related to you. And I really love when he opens and then slams the patient room doors. And the jumping on the couch - brilliance, like a fucking trampoline. Makes for a good time for all. And please next time you want to make an appointment get a little more annoyed with me for not accommodating your schedule. You make everyone late every time you are here. I am not allowing you to come in on the busiest day of the week so that everyone has to suffer through your fucking children. And it really helps the calm, peaceful atmosphere we strive to create in the office when your children start to scream... and even more so when you start to scream back at them. Yeah I wonder where they get this behavior from. Maybe three kids is a little overwhelming, but you know what we have other moms with their kids in here and they behave. And do not expect me to entertain your brats. I like the children that are respectful and not obnoxious and rude. Some people should not breed... or maybe you should get some training which you can then pass on to your kids. If you will not sit your kids down, do not be angry when I do it myself.

Love,
Me


And one more, to someone I know very well.

Dear Me,
I love that you are a smart cookie. I love that you are skeptical of things you are told until it is proven to be true. But I hate the fact that you get attached to people whom you have no business getting attached to. Stupid, stupid, stupid girl. You are jaded and cynical. People come to you for advice because you tell it like it is and don't sugarcoat shit. Now what the hell is your problem?!? Sometimes people are just people. You know well enough not to listen to pretty words, promises and appreciation. STOP BEING STUPID. Or you are just asking for a world of pain and you will have no one to blame but yourself.

And... can you please take it easy? We had surgery 4 weeks ago, yes technically, it has been awhile, but the doctor said you have a couple more months until you are fully healed. You have at least a month before you can do strenuous activities. So stop trying to do 20 hour days with no rest. We have already had to go to the ER once since surgery, which led to a 3 hour doctor visit, which is leading to another doctor visit, at another office, in another town because you have worried your doctor. Good job a-hole. You DON'T have to take care of everyone, all the time. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. That is the most important. You can't do anything if you are laid up in the hospital. And you start school next week... remember your life gets twice as busy then. REST STUPID.

Love,
Me

Okay I'm glad I got that out about the mom. Man their visits annoy the hell out of me. Two apartments to look at tonight! I have no desire to pack. Whatsoever.

yeah yeah

so tomorrow i will write a better update.


can i just say that i hate guys sometimes? like most of the time. i wish i was super hot, it would be interesting to see the difference in treatment. not that i get treated like shit - but friendships are so fucking weird. i'm annoyed right now. i'm gonna go be lame in a corner and not talk to anyone anymore.

4.22.09 or Happy Earth Day!

Hello Beautiful!!! Courtesy of the NASA site. Happy Earth Day everyone!!!

90210 is garbage... how i love thee

After watching last night's trainwreck of a 90210 episode.

Dear people that write the script, tape the show and put it all together,
Do you not realize that you have serious issues with a time warp? It was first noticed when what's her face... give me a minute... Adrianna found out she was pregnant. In the episode preceding that she was in a very tiny bikini on the beach with Naomi. Remember? So go to the episode where she finds out she is pregnant and by the end of the episode she has a belly. Really? You do know that in a matter of hours you do not inflate with child correct? Maybe it's just me but something about that incident just did not work. And it was not a matter of months that these two episodes spanned, it was days. That is it.

Now on to last night's episode. This time warp issue is killing me. Donna finds the perfect boutique for her store. And the next day she is having an opening???? Don't try to tell me that it was a few days... cus then the Naomi plot you threw at me really does not make any sense. Nothing moves that fast, well maybe Donna threw money down and that was done but really? Her store was completely ready to be opened the following day - with a shindig thrown? I'm sorry but you must live in an imaginary world - or Beverly Hills really is that amazing and magical. DOUBT IT.

Oh and can we please discuss the disgusting, monkey sex that Naomi is having. I am 26 - at my age that's a damn good thought. Especially with the boy that has the hot car. He is delish and that car is super sexy, but in your television world they are 16! Are you kidding me? These two teenagers are so overwhelmed by lust that they had to do it in the forest and in a Chinese restaurant's bathroom... REALLY?? I mean I understand that in high school you have raging hormones - and I grew up in an area that was affluent and know all the crap that kids like that get in to but REALLY? Actual teenagers are watching this show - not just us 20 somethings trying to recapture the glory of Beverly Hills 90210. This is not the greatest message to put out in the world. I mean are you stupid! Kids will emulate what they see on tv and maybe a torrid love affair with random sex acts is not the smartest way to go about it.

And no matter how much I yell at the tv about how bad this show is, I will be there next Tuesday at 9pm. DAMN YOU for being so bad it's good. (No, it's really just that bad, like a train wreck and I cannot look away.) However I am still not buying what you are selling 90210 people in charge. Fix your retardedness.

Love,
Me

Mamarazzi's Favorite Things Swap

This just seems super cool and I visited some of the sites that participated last time and decided I want to join in! The rules are simple enough:
c.Put together an amazing package filled with YOUR Favorite Things. This should be a package that you yourself would LOVE to receive (just to be clear...you don't fill it with the favorite things you already have you go buy new stuff and send that...like a brand new tube of your favorite mascara, a new copy of your favorite book or movie etc. Everyone clear?).
d. The contents of package should cost no more than $30 but be at least $20 total (not counting shipping).
e. Send package ON Saturday May 23. (IF you need to send sooner please let me know, the purpose for everyone sending at the same time means everyone is receiving around the same time. This makes the most sense for posting and linking up as people receive their packages).

I'm excited!

The Alphabet Meme... here goes.

Yeah the whole alphabet... it has been a shitty day and I cannot sleep. So why not bore the world with this meme and you can get to know me a bit better. And then later today I will tell you about how I want to escape my life and my relationship and about how I have a thing for someone that I should not.

The alphabet meme.

A.

Age:
26

Annoyance:
People who have fast cars and don't know how to fucking drive them. When people say they are going to do something and then don't do it. There are numerous answers to this A.

Allergic:
Lanolin, Amoxicillin, Penicillin, Codeine, Lithium, Aspirin, there might be more but I cannot remember them all.

Animal:
I love my dogs. Love them. I love all animals. I want to own a rescue one day. I love polar bears and black panthers, they are my favorites.

Actor:
I enjoy some Robin Williams and have developed the biggest thing for Joseph Gordon-Levitt. He is pretty freaking amazing and I love his indie movies.

B

Beer:
No thank you, I will pass.

Best Friend:
Cassie for the last 8 years or so. She's like a sister and I miss her when she travels the world. River most of the time. And oddly enough, I will make mention of Mike, it has been a weird relationship for the last 6 years but as he said this evening - you never know sometimes friendships just happen and people get close. And he has turned into a fantastic bestie.


Best feeling in the world:
When my puppies cuddle me.

Best weather
That time in the spring when I can wear flip flops and a t-shirt and not be cold.

Been in love?
Yes, of course. Love hurts. I want that movie love that seems so unreal and unattainable.

Been bitched out?
On a regular basis... but I am wicked quick and sharp, it will be returned.

Been on stage?
Yep yep, I played violin for a few years and was in chorus for a long time.

Believe in life on other planets?
Of course, why the hell not.


Believe in miracles?
Gotta believe in something.

Believe in magic?
I like me some magic.


Believe in God?
I believe there is something there, but I don't know about this belief in a higher power that is so discriminatory.


Believe in Satan?
I believe in evil.


Believe in ghosts?
I want to be a ghost hunter.

C

Car:
Jamison, my Saturn. I love him.


Candy:
Milkyways are delicious. Twizzlers and Gobstoppers make me happy too.


Color:
Black is my <3.>Cried in school?
Yeah I wouldn't be surprised. Probably mostly in 2nd grade. The parents were divorcing and it was a rough time.


Chinese or Mexican food?
Yes please!

Cake or pie?
Depends on the mood. But I do enjoy some apple pie, or peach pie, or pumpkin pie with whipped cream and ice cream.


Countries to visit:
England, France, Germany, Holland, Amsterdam, Poland, Costa Rica, Australia, Thailand, Iceland, Canada, Argentina, fuck I'll pretty much go anywhere.

D

Day or night?
I am a night owl. But I do love the daytime.

Dream vehicle:
Hello 1967 Corvette. Or pretty much any Corvette before 1980.


Dance in the rain?
I'm down. Let's do this.


Dance in the middle of the street?
I'm ok with this. And yeah I do this all the time.

E

Eggs?

Over easy please with french toast and lots of syrup. Yummy times.

Eyes:
They are blue. Very pretty if I do say so myself.


Everyone has a
secret and a dream.


Ever failed a class?
Yep. Shameful.

F

First crush:
I don't remember anymore.


First thought waking up:
Fuck.

Food:
I do love food... yummy delicious.


G

Greatest fear:
Snakes.


Gum
Yes. I cannot stand when people chew like cows though.

Get along with parents?
No. Haven't seen my dad since I was 7 and my mom kicked me out when I was 17.


Good luck charms:
Not really. I have a tiger's eye/Chinese good luck coin that I like to wear.


H

Hair color:
Don't quite know what it is naturally, but I do have a gray streak that showed up when I was 21. I am currently in a red phase.

Height:
5'4"

Happy?
It depends on the day.

Holidays?
I am not a fan. Unless it is Halloween. I love Halloween, want to move to Salem, Mass just so I can be surrounded by Halloween.


Health freak?
Not in the least... I'm a veg now that's about as close as I have gotten to health.

In (guys/girls)

Eye color?
I like all colors. I do not discriminate based on eye color.


Hair color?
The dark hair gets my motor running.


Height?
Taller than me is the only requirement.


Clothing style?
I'm not picky.

Characteristics
Sense of humor and a caring soul is always nice.

I

Ice cream:
Not so fond, but I do enjoy ben and jerry's.


Instrument:
I like boys that play instruments, like guitars and drums.

J

Jewelry
I wear various necklaces and plastic rings. That's about it.

Job:
I work for a chiropractor as her office manager and assistant. I start grad school next month to become an acupuncturist.


K

Kids
No thank you, unless Dave Navarro shows up on my doorstep and says that he wants me to carry his. Otherwise I'm good with being the cool aunt.


Keep a journal?
I try, for the things that I don't write here. But I suck at that as well.


L

Longest car ride?
To Pittsburgh.... never again.

Love:
I love my friends, I love River, I love my dogs and I love Dave Navarro.


Laughed so hard you cried:
Constantly.


Love at first sight?
Yeah, I might be corny like that.


M

Milk flavor:
I hate milk... cows don't even drink milk so why do humans?

Movie:
The Wizard of Oz, Grease, Across the Universe and now Adventureland.

Mooned anyone?
Of course, who hasn't?


Marriage?
No thank you.

Motion sickness?
Never. I'm that person that likes to read in the car.


N

Number of siblings:

2 brothers.

Number of piercings:
8 in my ears and 1 in my nose. I used to have and miss my: nipple rings, tongue ring, eyebrow ring, and labret.


Number
71 - my fave. 67 -makes me happy.


O

Overused phrases:
Lame sauce, Fuck, I want a break.


One wish
To be successful.


One phobia
Snakes and drowning.

P

Place you'd like to live
Salem, MA. San Diego, CA.

Pepsi or coke?
Dr. Pepper.

Q

Quail?
Huh? What?


R

Reason to cry:
Everyone has their own.


Reality tv?
I like RockStar with Dave. and pretty much everything on Bravo.


Radio station:
I stay away cus they mostly suck. But I do dig the classic rock station here.


Roll your tongue in a circle
My tongue does nothing exciting, I have no tricks.

S

Song?
Hurt by Nine Inch Nails, anything by Goo Goo Dolls

Sushi?
Love it!!!!!!!!! With some seaweed salad, sounds like a perfect meal.


Skipped school?
Guilty.


Slept outside?
It's been a long time but I like camping.


Seen a dead body?
A few and I did not enjoy it.

Skinny dipped>
nope, no way. not me, ever.

Shower daily?
I do, I love showers.


Sing well?
Not at all

Sing in the shower?
Sometimes.

Swear?
Have you read this at all? Like a sailor or actually worse than.

Strawberries or blueberries?
Strawberries. I spent a lot of time picking them off the bush and vine while growing up on a farm.

Scientists need to invent
Cures for cancer and AIDS and the money tree.

T

Time for bed:
Whenever my eyes start to shut, or when the sleeping pill kicks in.


Thunderstorms?
LOVE THEM, the louder the better.

U

Unpredictable?
I can be.


Under the influence:
In high school. I have never been drunk though. Came close a few weeks ago, but nope.

V

Vegetable you hate:
Peas and lima beans


Vegetable you love
Carrots, broccoli, peppers


Vacation spot:
I've been to Hawaii, California and Mass. I like a place with some history where I can walk around and enjoy the scenery.

W

Weakness:
My puppies. Going to good shows, boys with tattoos


Which one of your friends acts the most like you?
I don't think any of them. Cassie probably comes the closest.

Who makes you laugh the most?
River, Cassie,


Worst feeling:
Talking to my mother


Wanted to be a model?
Imma be a Suicide Girl, but I hate photos. Ironic I must say.


Where do we go when we die?
Who the hell knows


Worst weather:
When it's so hot you sweat just sitting.

Walk with a book on your head?
I don't see why not.


X

Ex-rays?
I had an accident once and I lost count after the 35th xray. All I know is the tech got yelled at for moving me around so much. I've had TONS of x-rays.

Y

Yellow
Had that on my walls once... big mistake.


Z

Zoo animals.
I don't like animals in cages but I figure they are taken care of a whole lot better than the ones in the puppy stores.


Zodiac sign?

Cancer. Through and through.

Catching up... Prompt Tuesday #49

Yeah so it's not Tuesday and this was 2 Tuesday's ago over at San Diego Momma. So shoot me. I had surgery that day and was passed out for 3 days after. But I just like this prompt so much that I decided I had to do it. Though it might reveal way tooooooo much about my crazy.

The prompt is to pull something out of your purse/wallet and tell a story about it. So there are two things, that go hand in hand, that get moved from wallet to wallet. Depending on my mood and my desire to have these new cool wallets I see. Besides the normal mundane, boring credit cards and money that move I have a guitar pick and a cigarette butt. Yeah it's grimy and I DON'T CARE. Who's are they do you ask? Oh well they are Dave Navarro's. Yeah I'm a fucking freak. This I know. They are from one of the shows he played with The Panic Channel in May of 2007. I was given the pick and I soooo grabbed the cigarette butt. Wow, I'm a little ashamed of myself. But anywho, I have the man's autograph tattooed to my arm why not carry a little more of him everywhere I go! I cannot tell you what it is about him for even I do not know...

*Hangs head in shame* Maybe I should not post this. LOLOLOLOL

4.10.09 or this coffee is an epic fail

So I order the coffee for the doc and I, I would say office but when there are 2 of you that is kind of stupid. Anyways, we always order a flavored coffee - this time around I thought I would try out Butter Toffee. Seeing as I enjoy the taste of toffee and caramel and all that good crap. Can I tell you that everytime I go to take a sip even with Vanilla Soymilk in it now it still smells like vomit? This is awful. I am so disappointed. I'm sticking with the regulars from here on out... I hate flavored coffee, tis not natural. Lame sauce I tell you.

I know that I should go and do stuff today, like take my car in to the mechanic for his check-up. Yes my car is a boy and his name is Jamison. Since River did drive him for 3 weeks and put like 3000 miles on him - and he's past due for some loving. But ummmm... I really don't feel like it today. I promise I will go get my new bank card but I think mechanic will happen on Monday. Thank you TD Bank for fucking up and not sending my card correctly before the end of the month and now 10 days into the month I am still without bank card and access to cash. And now that I am not lying on my couch in pjs I need to be able to get money. I am no longer able to really pull off the I'm in pain-you go get me stuff! Especially since I ran out of stuff for the pain yesterday and had to wait til I got home to get River (for he has his bank card), to get myself pain meds. This does not make for a happy kitty. AT ALL.

Fuck, today I'm hurting. But for the first time in 6 years I slept for 7 hours without waking up 3 times to pee. WHOA! Never thought that would happen. Thank you doctor. If I ever have a child, I might just owe you his name - or I'll just name my next dog after you. After I get the female that I will name Harley Quinn. Plans, people. I got them.

Back to work I go.

<3

4.9.09

I can't come up with anything witty. I don't know what the fuck I'm going to ramble on about today... so I give up. So yeah... unoriginal, uninspired me has decided to date this/future posts.

Quote of the day/week/month/life:

"It's not about the money we make, it's about the passions that we ache for. What makes your heart beat faster? Tell me now what does your body long after..." Anberlin


Went to the dentist today, am I the only one that absolutely loves having my teeth cleaned? Even though I had to have a cavity filled it was still a good time. I <3 my dentist, the tech, the hygienist, and Nicole, the receptionist.

And onto the good stuff... saw the doc for my post-op visit. Sooooo sorry for the gross stuff but apparently I had stringy, tissue adhesions on my ovaries, pelvic wall, uterus and bladder. Quite ugly to look at in the pictures but now they are all gone!!!! YAY! So 2 more weeks until I can become the runner that I want to become. And 1.5 months until I'm allowed to do abdomenal centered work (i.e. crunches, pilates, etc). Yeah cus I do that so much... I should be healed completely in about 2 months. Fun times.

I was sitting on the suicide girls site today and can I tell you that I am super excited to apply and to shoot a set with Siouxsie at the end of this month??? I hate pics but nudie times here I come. Yeah sorry if that image upsets people LOL. Oh good times. But seriously some guys are super gross on that site, the dirty emails I have received are sometimes skeevy yet quite hysterical!

Wish I had funny random thoughts today... oh here's one... while I was speeding from one doc to the other. Why is it that people make fucking power moves in their car to only get in the other lane around traffic and then drive like molasses? And why always in front of me, even when I'm not in a rush.... DAMN YOU PEOPLE! hahaha.

And I don't think I am bipolar... I think this is the reaction to coming off Zoloft. I swear I can do it this time au natural. Spring will make me happy.

I have a friend. I like him. He makes me happy. I'm keeping him.

Now back to Facebook to continue working on a page for my favorite band ever, A True Story. Let's start a grassroots campaign to get them signed. More later.

<3

Some random thoughts

Thank you San Diego Momma for coming to visit! It's nice when someone stops by my little corner and leaves some love.

Now some random thoughts:

- I felt sparkly today so I painted my nails a sparkly red color. I feel complete.

- Not being able to use a belt is a problem when your pants do not stay up and you have incisions in your abdomen. Hence the not being able to use a belt.

- Leaning against stuff HURTS when you have these aforementioned incisions in your abdomen.

- 90210 is my guiltiest pleasure, why in god's name I mention this here, and I hate the show. Yet I cannot stop watching it. AND TORI SPELLING is on next week. Can we just do a reunion show, eff these bi-polar, knocked-up, porn king kid, you're the one-you're not the one, my life cannot go on without you 16 year olds.

- After watching last night's guilty pleasure episode, I now think I am bi-polar.

- Watched Monday night's House and it hurt my heart. I understand that Kal Penn was offered an awesome job in Obama's White House, but SERIOUSLY suicide?? I watch this show for the snarky brilliance of House - NOT to CRY over Kutner.

- I have fantastic friends who took time out of their lives to babysit and take care of me last week when I was an invalid and I love them for it. Then I have some friends who kind of suck if I do say so myself.

- I have lost 5 pounds in the last week, I understand the liquid/painkiller diet is not all that healthy but food is not appealing, even a week after surgery. I would like to keep this small amounts of food diet up so I can continue to lose weight. I promise to throw in exercise and all that good stuff! And I have decided to stop calling myself fat, because I am not, I am curvy and out of shape LOL.

- Texting is evil. I have found the one person that I cannot text because he misconstrues everything I say and then gets mad and yells at me. And I cannot take the fact that he makes me cry. I am a retard. Damnet. It is not my fault that I am so fucking jaded I'm not used to people like him. Damn you SMS... damn you to hell, you broke me.

- I swear I am more positive ever since I went to my Tony Robbins seminar weekend. Yes, I said Tony Robbins-that man is awesome. Or I think I am, maybe not everyone around me concurs?

- I got accepted into the graduate program at Pacific College of Oriental Medicine and am pretty freaking excited even if it is $75,000 more of debt. Good debt, Katie, it is good debt. Keep telling myself this and I will be golden.

Okay wow I ramble a lot. I think I need to talk to someone about this manic-depressive thing LOL. Leave me some love... I am now going to visit my bloggie peeps and leave them some love.

-

I love pajamas

I have been back to work since yesterday and can I tell you that I miss the freedom of being able to wear pajamas at all times and to nap at all hours. I am healing... slowly but surely I am healing. Lots of pain in the abdominal area but I am getting through it with some extra strength rapid release tylenol, since I'm an idiot and didn't fill my entire percoset order. How I love percoset and knowing that I am not allergic to it. That is all for now... I will be back later, cus it is time for me to take my ass home and nap. LOLOL